Why Co-Parenting Feels Impossible Sometimes

Ben Horowitz’s The Hard Thing About Hard Things doesn’t offer easy solutions—because when you’re leading a company (or co-parenting a child), there aren’t any.

Hard things are hard not because there’s a secret formula you haven’t found yet, but because:

• Your emotions are at odds with your logic
• There are no perfect choices—only the best possible move at the time
• The weight of responsibility can feel isolating

The same is true for co-parenting. There’s no easy path, only the one you create.

The Two Biggest Co-Parenting Challenges & How to Handle Them

1. Emotional Decisions vs. Rational Decisions

Horowitz says great CEOs focus on the road, not the wall—meaning, they focus on where they want to go, not what they want to avoid.

Co-parents who fixate on what they don’t want (conflict, frustration, injustice) often find themselves steering right into it. Instead, focus on:

• What kind of co-parenting environment you want to create
• How to keep decisions aligned with your child’s well-being
• The best move forward—even if it’s not a perfect move

The ability to manage your own psychology is the hardest but most essential skill in co-parenting.

2. Carrying Too Much Alone

A great CEO doesn’t solve every problem alone—they get the maximum number of brains on the issue.

Co-parenting should be the same.

• Transparency creates solutions. If something isn’t working, communicate it rather than bottling frustration.
• A strong support system matters. Rely on family, professionals, and community to help navigate the hard things.
• A process beats emotional exhaustion. Systems keep things predictable when emotions run high.

BeH2O™ teaches parents that co-parenting success isn’t about avoiding struggle—it’s about learning to manage it effectively.

How to Stay Steady in the Hardest Moments

1. Get your head right. If you let emotions dictate decisions, you’ll make the wrong ones.
2. Be clear on why. Every hard choice should be measured against one standard: Does this support my child’s long-term well-being?
3. Don’t delay tough decisions. Problems don’t get easier over time—they get worse.
4. Build a system that mitigates recurring issues. The best co-parenting structures prevent problems before they happen.

The most difficult thing about co-parenting isn’t the logistics—it’s managing your own mindset so you don’t let the hard things define you.

Actionable Challenge for the Week

Think of a current co-parenting struggle that feels overwhelming. Ask yourself:

• Am I focusing on the road or the wall?
• Have I brought in the right people to help solve this?
• Am I getting stuck in the emotions, or am I making the best possible move?

The only way to survive hard things is to keep moving forward.

Looking Ahead: Focusing on What Matters Most

Next week, we’ll dive into 10x Is Easier Than 2x—learning how to focus on the high-impact parenting moves instead of getting lost in the small stuff.