Co-Parenting Is Bigger Than Two People

Based on the work of Seth Godin 

Seth Godin’s Tribes reminds us that leadership isn’t about control—it’s about connection. It’s not about power—it’s about purpose.

And in co-parenting, that insight matters more than most people realize.

When a relationship ends, it’s easy for parents to become isolated. To divide up calendars, roles, homes—and unintentionally shrink the circle around their child. But children don’t just need parents. They need a tribe.

A tribe that shares values. A tribe that holds them steady. A tribe that gives them language, safety, and identity.

What a “Tribe” Looks Like in Co-Parenting

In BeH2O™, we talk a lot about systems. But systems mean nothing without people. And the strongest co-parenting systems are those that involve:

• Teachers who hear the same message from both homes

• Grandparents who reinforce consistency

• Therapists, coaches, or pastors who are invited into shared context

• Family friends or neighbors who offer support, not division

Your tribe is everyone surrounding your child who helps carry the values you want them to grow up with.

And just like in any tribe, that takes intentional leadership.

Why This Matters More Than Ever

In high-conflict co-parenting situations, it’s easy to shut people out—to “protect” your side of the story or minimize confusion.

But often, that creates more fragmentation. The child ends up switching not just homes—but worldviews. And that lack of consistency can quietly erode their stability.

Godin says tribes form around three things:

1. A shared story

2. A common belief

3. A leader who’s willing to step forward

Co-parents who embrace this create rituals, language, and structure that help their child feel held—even when the family is no longer intact in the traditional sense.

How BeH2O™ Applies This

In BeH2O™, we help co-parents:

• Create a shared mission statement grounded in values

• Proactively define who’s part of the child’s support circle

• Clarify how key adults communicate around the child

• Build bridges with professionals, educators, and caregivers—so the child isn’t carrying the burden of relaying messages or navigating confusion alone

This is systems thinking.
This is inclusive leadership.
And it’s exactly what Seth Godin meant when he said: “Leaders create a culture where people want to belong.”

Takeaway

You may be co-parenting across two homes—but you can still lead together.

And you don’t have to be aligned on everything to agree that your child deserves a steady, consistent, values-driven tribe around them.

That’s leadership. That’s co-parenting. That’s the village.

You can buy Seth Godin’s Tribes here or watch his TedTalk here.

Coming Up Next

Next week, we turn to Thinking in Bets by Annie Duke and explore how to make smarter co-parenting decisions when certainty is off the table—and the stakes are high.